It's been almost almost (16/3-8am)40hours since i last slept. Almost (16/3-7pm)32 hours since i last ate.

It's not that i'm purposely depriving myself of these. It's just that i can't seem to sleep or eat. I look at food & find them not appetizing. I lie on the bed only to burst out crying.

I know i wouldn't be able to do all these till there's an answer but i'm willing to wait.

Now i know the best slimming medicine on earth is to get your heart shattered into pieces.

My current fave song is sung by Gary Cao Ge - Bei Pan. Every single word & sentence feels exactly like me.

Note: Direct translation of english by the side

雨 (rain)
不停落下来 (keep falling non stop)
花 (flowers)
怎么都不开 (why don't they bloom anymore)
尽管我细心灌溉 (no matter how much effort i put in)
你说不爱就不爱 (you say don't love means don't love)
我一个人 (i alone)
欣赏悲哀 (appreciate sadness)

爱 (love)
只剩下无奈 (left with no choice)
我 (me)
一直不愿再去猜 (don't want to guess anymore)
钢琴上黑键之间 (in between the black keys on the piano)
永远都夹着空白 (there's always a white space)
缺了一块 (short of 1 piece)
就不精采 (it isn't as exciting)

Chorus:
紧紧相依的心如何 (tightness of the heart how to)
say goodbye
你比我清楚还要我说明白 (u're clearer then me but still expect me to say clearly)
爱太深会让人疯狂的勇敢 (deep love allows people to be madly brave)
我用背叛自己 (i betray myself)
完成你的期盼 (to fulfill your wishes)

把手放开不问一句 (let go without questioning anything)
say goodbye
当作最后一次对你的溺爱 (treat it as the last form of pamperness)
冷冷清清淡淡今后都不管 (cold cold clear clear dull dull, from now on, all don't care)
只要你能愉快 (as long as you're happy)

心有一句感慨 (the heart has a tinge of emotion)
还能够跟谁对白 (who else can i communicate with)
在你关上门之前 (before you close the door)
替我再回头看看 (please turn back & have a look)
那些片段 (those old memories)
还在不在 (are they still here or not)